It's Patchouli Friday: Profumum Patchouly, Bois 1920 Real Patchouly, M. Micallef Patchouli, Montale Patchouli Leaves, Les Nereides Patchouli Antique, Etro Patchouly

Profumum Patchouly: leaps out of the gate as a no-nonsense, take no prisoners medicinal patchouli. Your average sweet and floral perfume lover will be startled by the high-pitched mint & mothball breath of Profumum Patchouly and flee to seek comfort and solace elsewhere. True patchouli aficionados, however, will be thrilled. Includes amber, sandalwood and incense ingredients (the incense is especially nice), but these are added sparingly and only show up much later in the game.

Bois 1920 Real Patchouly: gentler at the start than the Profumum Patchouly, Bois 1920 softens the biting top note of patchouli with a dash of lemon and a tablespoon of velvety sandalwood, drifting lazily into vanilla and amber territory with each ticking of the clock. I have to admit it's amusing that they named it "Real Patchouly" since it works so hard at tamping down the harsh edges that are part and parcel to the smell of the genuine article. Nevertheless, a soothing and pleasant ride on the patchouli bandwagon.

M. Micallef Patchouli: a somewhat subdued patchouli that opens with the fresh green scent of violet leaves. A blend of orris root, heliotrope and vanilla moves in and then it's goodbye patchouli and hello Cheesecake Factory. Benzoin, cistus and balsam tolu contribute to the sugary vanilla flavor of the mix, and it's only the presence of cedarwood and vetyver that keep it from collapsing into a diabetic coma. A sweet, feminine perfume with an earthy touch. Consumers who don't like patchouli will buy this in a heartbeat.

Montale Patchouli Leaves: kind of like what M. Micallef Patchouli tries to be, but wisely leaving out the desert course. Montale Patchouli Leaves has an earthy, leafy tone that reins in the sharp bite of actual patchouli so that you're smelling what might be patchouli plants growing in a deep forest. There's a bit of oak and vanilla and labdanum, but it's a fine-tuned mix and the three work with the main patchouli ingredient rather than against it, softening the edges and smoothing out the bite. The vanilla is, at times, more noticeable than I'd prefer, but in comparison to M. Micallef Patchouli, it's a veritable model of restraint.

Les Nereides Patchouli Antique: smells like patchouli doused in sweet cane rum. Not unpleasant, especially if you like the smell of cane rum. Yum!

Etro Patchouly: there must be a lot of light musk in Etro Patchouli, as this is the soapiest, cleanest patchouli fragrance I've ever smelled. Stripping out anything and everything that might be considered dark or earthy, Etro has kicked the dirty hippie vibe to the curb and come up with a light, white floral patchouli for all you freshly showered, sporty types. Would work well for summer wear. I hate it (my apologies to the friend who sent me the sample).

In summation: Profumum Patchouly is the most genuinely patchouli-ish of the bunch, graced with a nice incense afterburn; Montale Patchouli Leaves gets a big thumbs up for its green forest vibe; M. Micallef Patchouli is so sweet I got cavities just by sniffing it; Bois 1920 Real Patchouly opts for the hippie sandalwood routine, making it a smooth ride; Les Nereides Patchouli Antique is what your alcoholic Aunt would drink wear to the family Christmas party; and Etro Patchouly is so very zestfully clean, but is it really patchouli?

And what better way to bring our Patchouli Friday to a close than with a video clip of way-stoned hippies dancing -- have a good weekend, y'all!